Maftir

The final chapter of the Torah reading on Saturdays is called Maftir. Well, this is the Maftir of our story.

We arrived in New York and stayed with Rezsi and Miklos in their old apartment on Manhattan Avenue. The family had increased with the addition of their second son, Benjamin (Benny), whom we now met for the first time. We stayed with them, in spite of our wish to go to a hotel. They insisted that we stay with them and left us no choice but to accept. Despite the limited space, surprisingly, we did not feel crowded. It was just like one family. Both Miklos and Rezsi went out of their way to make us feel at home, and indeed, we did.

I started to inquire of my many friends as to what the business possibilities were. Miklos was most helpful. He took a two week vacation for the sole purpose of helping me locate something suitable. I was, by then, not without some means, and in a short time, had all kinds of offers, both to purchase existing enterprises or to buy into partnerships. For two solid weeks, Miklos took me to all the places I had on my list. By then he knew the entire transportation system of New York and saved me an enormous amount of time. He was, as well, available for consultation and advice. He was a keen observer and knew many of the contacts I had to deal with. If Miklos himself did not know, he always managed to find out.

We arrived in New York in July, when the heat and humidity are at their peak and this greatly influenced my ultimate decision. Maybe unknowingly, but subconsciously, New York did not make a favorable impression on me, nor on Helen, nor on our children. This was just not the way we wanted to arrange our lives. Maybe, we were spoiled by having become accustomed to a slower pace and more comfortable life style.

I was amazed at how people traveled on the subways. They pushed themselves in, sooner or later found a place to sit down, and promptly fell asleep. How they managed to wake up just a minute or two before their destination, remains a mystery to me.

While in New York, I phoned an old acquaintance of mine, Shlojme Steinberg. As you may remember, he was from Volove. We went to school together. He was the one I supported with a ticket to the "free table". It was his return trip from Brno to Chust in 1939, that I had financed. He was living in Newark, New Jersey, and probably still lives there. He was working in an upholstery shop. I said to him, "Shlojme, this is Tibi speaking. How are you?" He said, "Who?" I repeated, "This is Tibi from Volove." After what seemed to be a very long time, the answer was "I think I know who you are." I hung up. Maybe he thought I needed some help from him. Maybe he was afraid I would remind him of all the past favors that he had so willingly accepted at the time.

Shlojme was the exception, though. Even his older brother, who lived not very far from Rezsi, came to visit us, and was genuinely happy to see me. When I told him of his brother's "short memory" he did not seem very surprised. During my short stay, I met a number of old friends and fellow lantsmen (fellow countrymen). To my regret, most of them, were salaried workers. This was surprising to me only because most of them had been in business at home, and I somehow expected that by now they would be merchants again.

I also came to the conclusion that the average newcomer to Canada was better off than his counterpart in New York. All this tended to make a very bad first impression on me and after a two week search, I decided there must be a different America somewhere else. New York, after all, was only New York, not America.

My cousins Hedi and Elvi, by this time, had families of their own. Hedi was living in Los Angeles. Later on, she would move to Beverly Hills. Karl was doing very well in his enterprise. They had two sweet little girls, Myra and Anne. I accepted their invitation and stayed with them for about two weeks. The house they lived in was their own, in a good neighborhood. It was quite a contrast to what I had seen in New York. Karl did everything he could to help me in my quest. He drove me around town, showing me here and there, this and that. He had good connections with real estate brokers, especially those specializing in liquor stores. I had been considering going into the liquor business in New York. But there were many inherent dangers in operating such a store. Liquor stores stayed open late and the incidence of holdups was considerable. As it turned out, I did not have to make any such decisions. In New York only U.S. citizens can obtain liquor licenses. In California, however, there were no such limitations. As a landed immigrant, I could purchase an existing license and conduct business. Nevertheless, the danger of armed robberies existed there, too. I met a number of newcomers like myself who owned liquor stores, and most of them did well. It was, for the most part, a sure business with fixed prices and a reasonable profit. The disadvantages were the long hours and the dangers involved.

I decided that this would not suit my character. I was looking for something unlimited in possibilities. I was looking for an open type of business, one which would allow me to create in accordance with my ability. Liquor stores were restricted as to location, expansion and even as to the traditional suppliers. There was nothing to do but stock the shelves and wait for customers or holdupmen. This was not for me.

During the time I spent in New York and Los Angeles, I stayed in constant touch with Harry. He definitely wanted me to come back to Montreal and look over his operation. Elvi also invited me to come to Chicago and look around there. I decided to first return to New York City, then take my family to Lake George for a vacation. The heat in New York was just too much for them.

Rezsi insisted that we take a look at the beaches in Rockaway. It was so crowded there, one could hardly move. I believe at least half of New York must have been there. It was definitely not for us. I phoned Harry. I would not be able to see him for the next two weeks as we all needed to cool off and would be going to Lake George. To my surprise, Harry was thinking of taking a vacation too. "Why not meet at Lake George?" we agreed.

We spent a pleasant two weeks at the lake, staying at the Motel Montreal. The owners were two young Jewish men from New York who gave us the best rooms in the house. Eleanor and Harry·'·s daughter, Vivian, became good friends. When Sonia, Harry·'·s wife invited Eleanor to go back to Montreal with them, we readily allowed her to go. I was to meet Harry in Montreal in a few days.

The three of us, Helen, Fay and I returned to New York. I was sorry for Fay. She was alone, but she was such a good child, she never complained.

I left for Montreal to spend the next ten days looking over Harry's operation. I was allowed to examine all the books of the past few years and after guestimating the approximate amount of stock, I came to the sorry conclusion that my good friend Harry was losing money. While his books showed a small profit every year, in reality there were deficits masterfully covered up by higher evaluations of inventory. These maneuvers were necessary to protect the company's credit at the bank. By showing losses, the bank and suppliers would likely have cut off or even have completely eliminated his credit.

On the "plus" side of the balance sheet, I could see great possibilities that would come with additional infusion of capital and proper management. Harry employed a manager, whom he fully trusted, to handle the day to day operations. I could envision certain changes that would lead to reduced expenses. There was place galore to increase the sales. Other changes could come from diversification of our lines, eliminating certain unprofitable items and even unprofitable customers.

I tentatively decided to become a 50% partner. Making my final decision about the proposed partnership had to wait another few days. Helen and I had always made important decisions together. It had always worked for us and I was not going to change things now, especially when this had to be the most important step we'd take since coming to America There was more involved than only our livelihood. The education of our children had to be considered. In Montreal, they would have to catch up on the French language, and it was still important to us to further their Jewish education. Lastly, Helen had been looking forward to being united with Yolan and Rezsi in New York. Moving to Montreal would mean being separated again, although New York to Montreal was only a few hours by train or bus. They could visit one another more frequently than when we had lived in Calgary. Nonetheless, all this had to be decided upon and I told Harry that I tentatively agreed to the partnership, pending approval by Helen.

I assured my wife that the girls' Jewish education would be no problem. After I assured her that we would even live in a predominantly Jewish district, Helen agreed to move to Montreal. I left Eleanor in Montreal while I headed for New York. Helen, Fay and I packed our few belongings and the three of us returned to Montreal together. This time, it was to settle permanently. I confirmed my decision to Harry. All our agreements were verbal. That was the way both our families had conducted their affairs, with a handshake. To us that was firmer than any written contract. I had known Harry since childhood. I knew his parents, and all of his brothers and sisters. He likewise knew all about me and my family. That's the way business was conducted at home, and that's the way we decided we would do it here. Other than signing over 50% of the shares to me, no other written contract was ever made between us.

In the years from August 1961 to May 1984, the duration of our partnership, we never had any serious disagreements. We did have, on many occasions, diverse opinions. These were always resolved by discussion, each of us giving a little and taking a little. Partnerships are not made in heaven, but I firmly believe friendships are. To this very day, we remain close friends and in addition to phoning each other on an almost daily basis, we meet twice a week for a two hour lunch, where we discuss our experiences and problems. Each of us feels thankful to the other for a job well done.

Helen was reassured by the closeness of Montreal to New York, and indeed, during the next few years, our visits to New York, as well as the Kirschenbaums' visits to us were markedly increased. This was in sharp contrast to the previous years, when Helen had visited New York only once, traveling by train with our two children all the way from Calgary. Yolan had come to Calgary for a short stay with us, but Rezsi and family were never able to make such a long journey. I also visited New York but once from Calgary, when I met Rezsi, Miklos and son Jack for the first time. Benny had not yet been born.

Returning to Montreal, we again accepted the kind invitation from my new partner and his wife, Sonia. The girls became good friends, Eleanor with Vivian and Fay with Doris. They were good matches, as both pairs were in the same age group. Helen and Sonia hit it off fabulously and all their friendships prevail to this day. It did not take us very long to find a suitable apartment, right across the street from the school our girls would attend. Our furniture arrived from Calgary and we were once more a family together. The wandering Jews had found a home once again. Our apartment was cozy though not as roomy as our house in Calgary. For the time being, we were satisfied to live there, until we could purchase a house of our own.

In our wholesale textile import business, things started to fall into place. I replaced the sales manager and other important changes were made in the rank and file of our sales personnel. Non-performing accounts were eliminated. As we paid our suppliers promptly, they began to deal with us more seriously. All this contributed to lower expenses and, combined with a better turnover, resulted in a favorable income statement. We were able to increase our salaries accordingly and declare dividends on a regular basis.

The two year lease we had signed for our apartment now became a liability. We found a suitable house on Palmer Avenue, which was to become our home for the next sixteen years. I offered my landlord, Mr. Nisker, two months' rent to allow me to break our lease. He refused. We moved out anyway, and he promptly took legal action, attaching a lien on our new house and furniture. Mr. Nisker was as "hard as nails", and very greedy. In our case, this led to his downfall. Soon after we moved out he allowed his nephew, a single man, to move into our vacated apartment. If he thought we would never find out about this, he was sadly mistaken. The janitor, a Polish immigrant with a Hungarian wife, gave me this information in return for my promise to protect his anonymity. I was able to prove, with the help of other witnesses, that the apartment was occupied. The judge rejected his claim, with expenses.

We now slowly furnished our house, except for the basement. Even without a finished basement, we had eight rooms. That was quite enough room for our children to throw an occasional party. Eleanor was very much in favor of a finished basement. I, on the other hand, decided to install a ping-pong table and some exercise equipment. As it turned out, we got along without a fancy basement and the ping pong table gave us many hours of good exercise and lots of pleasure. Even Helen became a really good player.

Life was good. It was now time to start traveling and see the rest of the world. In 1962, we visited Israel for the first time. Since then we've returned five times. On our first trip overseas, our children stayed with Harry and Sonia, and we reciprocated when they traveled. We visited practically all the western European countries at least once. Not all our travels were planned in advance, however, such as one to Great Britain. One day I came to the office to find bad news waiting for me. One of our suppliers in England was very slow in delivering badly needed goods. Harry and I both felt that a mere telephone call would not produce fast enough results. We decided that I should make a personal visit. At 10:00 a.m. I phoned Helen, and asked her to be ready to accompany me on my special mission. It was three weeks before Eleanor's wedding. Helen pointed this out to me, but she really had no valid reason to remain at home. All the arrangements had been made, the catering arranged, the hall in the synagogue rented, the musicians contracted, and the main thing, the dresses were already in our closets. There was really nothing else for us to do to prepare for our simcha. So she concurred and was ready in record time.

My Uncle Laci now visited us occasionally. He was always on the go, doing favors for everybody except himself. When I was in New York, he offered me everything he had if I would just agree to remain in the city. His apartment and his business, both on Orchard Street, were mine for the asking. Subsequently, he realized that I had made the right decision in returning to Montreal. While he was never really angry with me for settling in Montreal, he was disappointed, and somehow always regretted my move. He told me, on several occasions, how much better off he would have been if I had stayed in New York. Even if I had not decided to be his partner, my just being nearby would have made a great difference in his life.

I have my doubts that I could have changed him. He opened his store whenever he felt like it. For him, a good book was reason enough to stay at home. A piece of salami, with a Spanish onion on a slice of bread was a gourmet meal. He was a happy-go-lucky guy. In emergencies, he could always call on his nieces, Hedi and Elvi, and his only nephew, me. He did not need much help. On the one or two occasions that he requested a loan, he repaid it as soon as he could. In his will, which I still have, his first concern was that all his debts be paid first, and only then, the rest be divided among the three of us. He was a really fine man, with a heart of gold. We could not wish for a more loving uncle than our Uncle Laci. I only hope we did not disappoint him.

Yolan was still living in New York. She had a room on 96th Street in Manhattan, which she rented from a Mrs. Liebman, a fine lady who had been widowed for some time. They got along very well. Yolan was still working and was home only in the evenings and on weekends. As I often travelled to New York, I tried to visit her whenever time permitted. In any event, I always phoned her. She came to visit us a few times. Helen came along with me on several occasions and stayed with her, dividing her time between both sisters, while I attended to business.

Yolan's health began slipping visibly. Her arthritic heart started to be a source of worry. Her condition had been worsened by the suffering she had endured in the camp and the high fever she had run in the forest near Hamburg. All this contributed to a significant deterioration. Her stubbornness and refusal to quit work speeded up the process. It would now not be long before she was almost completely bedridden.

The rest of the family kept prospering. In Chicago, Elvi was now the mother of three children. She had two beautiful girls and a good looking son named Mark. Elvi's husband, Fred, was talking about early retirement, but in the meantime, was the same workaholic as before, leaving early in the morning and working until late. Even the weekends were no different.

Hedi, Karl, and their children, now beautiful teenagers, moved to Beverly Hills. Karl purchased the house from a movie personality and completely redecorated and refurnished the whole complex. He installed a swimming pool with changing rooms, and even set up a separate apartment upstairs, used by the girls for their quiet studies and for occasional guests. He was always an ardent Zionist. Now he could back up his love for Israel with large contributions and frequent trips to Israel.

Rezsi and her family were in their new apartment on Webster Avenue. It was a new building in a nice Jewish neighborhood. Both children were attending Hebrew School. Mildos was working for a company producing memorial tablets for synagogues and other Jewish organizations. His knowledge of Hebrew was fully utilized there, as he was translating the inscriptions to be put on the plaques from English into Hebrew. With both working, Rezsi, at an exclusive dress shop, their finances improved dramatically. Miklos had several sisters living in Israel and so visited there frequently, sometimes with Rezsi, many times alone, as Rezsi was not so keen about visiting there.

In Montreal, all the cousins were now well established. Nathan purchased the business from his boss, Mr. Mallen. Moshe worked as an operator in a coat factory. When there was no work available, he worked for Nathan. Ernest remained on the same job, as a presser, until his retirement. They all did well. Nathan and Sara brought up four children, all college educated, all married by now. Moshe was a good earner. He bought his own house and two of his children, Helen and Allan are married. Allan has two boys of his own. His younger daughter, Anne, is still unmarried. Ernest has a son and a daughter, each single.

Fanny worked in a dress factory until her retirement. After I left her husband Harry in Newfoundland, he tried several other ventures. He finally ended up at his old job as a carpenter in a furniture factory. He died suddenly, leaving behind his wife and his young daughter, Arlene. Fanny, a widow for eighteen years, looks better now than before. Arlene is happily married with two children.

In the meantime, Yolan's health continued to deteriorate. She was no longer able to work and after a while became completely bedridden. She moved in with Rezsi and stayed there several months but her wish was to come to Montreal once more, and be together with Helen and our children. She was not able to travel by conventional means, so we sent an ambulance from Montreal to pick her up. Her stay with us was but a short one. She died four weeks after arriving in MontreaL where she is buried. She was only forty-three years young.

In 1968, our daughter, Eleanor, married Larry Tannenbaum, a future electronics engineer. He was then still a student. At Eleanor's wedding, our guests included my cousins Hedi Elvi and Big Hedi. Their husbands could not attend. My Uncle Laci came from New York and stayed with us for two days and was very happy to see his niece getting married to a nice Jewish boy. The young couple rented an apartment in Montreal and upon Larry·'·s graduation, moved to Ottawa, where both of them had positions with the government.

Eleanor chose to give up her college career in order to support her husband while he was still in college in Montreal. The delay was a temporary one. She later completed all her courses and received her BA degree from York University in Toronto. We are very proud of her achievement. We realize how difficult it must have been for her to start again after a considerable time lapse, especially when she had a family as well as a job. Hurray for Eleanor! She is a Friedman, not a quitter. Now Customer Service Manager for a publisher of children's books, she is doing a terrific job, receiving accolades from the president of the company on several occasions.

The atmosphere and action at the government office were too slow for Larry, so he accepted our offer to join our company. Eleanor and Larry moved back to Montreal. Our granddaughter, Heather, was born a short time later. It took five years to give us our first grandchild. They moved into their own house in Dollard des Ormeaux, a suburb of Montreal. Eleanor was pregnant again, and this time did not look for work. She devoted the next few years to raising her children. Heather and Jeffrey are grateful to have had their mother at home when they were small and needed her most.

Larry stayed with our company for eight years. He was a valuable addition to our firm, but he remained an electronics engineer at heart. He always brought books dealing with electronics to the office with him. On one of his frequent flights west, which was now his territorial responsibility, he struck up a conversation with a fellow passenger. After talking to him for four hours, the man offered him a job. As it turned out, the stranger was the owner of a medium-sized electronics company and Larry was just what he was looking for. Larry asked both Harry and me if we would mind if he left us, as he really would prefer to pursue a career in electronics. We were very sorry to lose him, but if that was what he wanted, we could but wish him good luck in his new venture. At first, his new job kept him in MontreaL which was fine with us, as we could see them all on weekends and often even during the week.

1976 was a memorable year for us. Our younger daughter, Fay married Ronald (Ronnie) Freiman, a mechanical engineer later turned Chartered Accountant (CA in Canada, CPA in the U.S.A.). They were both finishing McGill University. Fay graduated with a Masters' degree in Business Administration. Hedi and Elvi, again came to the wedding, this time with their husbands. In attendance were all the Gedlofs and Gedajlovic (Ernest) and their families; Rezsi, Miklos and Benny. Jack who was by that time married, came with his wife, Bonnie. Big Hedi did not come.

Also absent, was my Uncle Laci, who had died a short time before the wedding. He collapsed suddenly and was taken to the Presbyterian Hospital in uptown Manhattan. Cigarette smoking had damaged his lungs. Laci put up a good fight. He lay in the intensive care unit for several weeks. I, being the closest distance wise, flew in almost every week to visit him. Hedi and Elvi also came down. He could not taLk to us. He tried to write something down, but could not garner enough strength. He died quietly, and I made arrangements to bring him to Montreal for burial. Hedi was not feeling well and could not attend but Elvi came and stayed with us. We all miss Laci. He was our last uncle on the Friedman side of the family.

Also in 1976, Eleanor gave birth to her second child, Jeffrey Brian (J.B.). He was a cute baby, and very good natured. Now we had two grandchildren and could expect more from both daughters.

After Fay left, our house suddenly became too quiet and too large for the two of us. The telephone rang far less now, and there were no longer visits from her friends. We became an old couple practically overnight. Helen no longer wanted to work in the rock garden in front of our house and we had given up our vegetable patch a long time ago. (In spite of having a gardener, it was Helen who did all the work the gardener omitted.) We left for a vacation in Florida and decided to put the house up for sale. The year was 1978.

It took us exactly two weeks to sell the house to the third party who came to see it. Our house had a terrific layout, with large rooms, a hall that was larger than in most homes of that type, good floors everywhere, including brand new carpets which had been laid just two years prior. We temporarily rented a two bedroom apartment in the Presidential Towers, with the intention of looking for a condominium.

In contrast to Toronto, Montreal was not yet rich in condominiums, but the trend was towards conversion of existing buildings. New luxury condos were beginning to crop up, but it would be another year or two until they would be ready.

When Presidential Towers converted to condominiums we were among the first ones to buy. It was not exactly what we wanted, but for the time being, for the two of us, it would have to do.

In 1981, our daughter Fay gave birth to her first child, our second grandson, Brandon. Fay could now see how wrong she had been and how right we had been to contradict her, when she cried to us, "I will never get married and have children as nice as Eleanor's." Now she could look at Brandon and see for herself how wrong she had been on both counts.

In December, Larry, Eleanor and the family moved to Toronto. Larry·'·s boss had called upon him to take over as sales manager at the head office. They bought a house in a nice section of Thornhill, where they still live happily to this very day. Larry is now Vice President of Sales. Eleanor had completed her education while holding a job at the same time. Her children were now teenagers, and could look after themselves for an hour or two, the time difference between their coming home from school and Eleanor's return from work.

1981 was also the year we bought our condominium at Colony Point in Pembroke Pines, Florida. At that time, we could not remain in Florida for the entirety of the harsh Canadian winters. We used to go to Florida for only six weeks, from the beginning of January to mid-February. Even that short period helped us to escape the coldest weather at home.

Life continued on an even keel for the most part. We had offers to sell our business. For the time being, neither Harry nor I considered such a step. Fay and Ronnie bought a condominium in the Presidential Towers, simply because of the high rate of inflation. It was generally expected that properties would go up in value as the inflationary pressure mounted. This was true indeed.

Fay and Ronnie did not stay there very long, and after making several offers on different houses and being refused, they finally found a suitable property at a price they were willing to pay. They did well. The house has been improved considerably since then, and is constantly being updated to this very day.

1984 was another memorable year. In May of that year, we sold our business and retired. The purchasers were the same people who had offered to buy us out a few years earlier. At first, I was reluctant to retire at the age of 62. But Harry wanted badly to get out and take a long rest. His health was deteriorating and he thought he deserved a few years of carefree living. To his everlasting honor, I must state, he offered me his shares at a considerably lower price than even the first offer of the ultimate buyers.

I considered this option for a while, but Helen was very much against it. For one man alone, it would be too much. On the other hand, I did not have the patience to start looking for a suitable replacement for my partner. We sold out. I think Harry missed the action much less than I did. It took me about two years to get used to doing things for myself. I no longer had the power of an office behind me. When Helen would ask me to buy her wrapping paper and cord for a parcel to be sent to IsraeL I would tell her I did not know where to buy such things. But I knew where I could get it for free. Just how long could I impose on my friends for the many favors I was used to getting done, in my own office, by a competent staff?

In September, Fay gave birth to our third grandson, Matthew. She took off the allotted eighteen weeks from her job at the Bank of Montreal to stay at home. Fay holds a very demanding and responsible position as an Account Manager. It is especially difficult now with the banks being doubly conservative in lending. Fay would love to stay home and take care of her family and Ronnie is forever encouraging her to do so. She is deep down in her heart, a professional who would not be happy staying at home. The position which she would like best would be to work three days a week but such jobs are not so readily available. She is in a well-paying position and the money and lifestyle it affords are not so easy to give up. For the time being, she is sticking in there. I would not be surprised to see her, sooner or later, in a business of her own. She is certainly a very capable girl.

Rezsi died in 1988 after a prolonged illness. She finally stopped smoking, but unfortunately it was too late. The damage had already been done. At the time, we were in Florida, and had to rush back to be at the funeral in New York. Only eight months later, her husband, Miklos followed, collapsing at his Senior Citizens Club. Death was instantaneous. At least he died not suffering. He came to visit us in Montreal after Rezsi's death and we gave him as good a time as we could. He was a terrific man. He was planning to come to winter with us in Florida. His only worry was whether I would take him for prayer services every morning, as he was saying Kaddish for Rezsi. He had my assurance that I would.

In December of 1989, we celebrated Jeffrey’s Bar Mitzvah at the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem. Not only did we, the grandparents, attend but Fay, Ronnie, Brandon and Matthew were there, too, along with our in-laws, Mr. and Mrs. Freiman. They came to celebrate with us, along with our many relatives on both sides of the family, living in Israel. The reception and dinner were hosted at the Sheraton Jerusalem. In March of 1990, the second part of the Bar Mitzvah was held in Toronto. This time a large group from Montreal attended, including Harry, Ludvik, the Gedlofs, and Ernest, accompanied by their wives, Fanny, Nathan's daughter Judy, and her husband, Sander.

In June of the same year, we celebrated our granddaughter's Sweet Sixteen birthday party. We call her our most favored granddaughter, as so far, she is the only girl. This party was held on a boat, cruising on Lake Ontario. The music the kids were so happily dancing to, drove us crazy. It was, nevertheless, a lot of fun.

We have told our story above and beyond what we originally intended. Our children and even our grandchildren can take it from here if they wish to keep an account of the family history.

As you all know by now, we did not climb Mount Everest, and this is not the Great American Novel. We, nevertheless, can look back with pride at having brought up our girls in a nice Jewish way, the way our parents would have liked. We were fortunate in their choice of husbands. Both larry and Ronnie are fully a part of our family, as if they would not be our sons-in-law, but our own children. We fed we have accomplished in that regard all we really wanted, and, at times, did not even dare to dream of.